Will we ever change India?

This happens to be one of the most controversial topics, especially in India.  More so right now with the whole Nirbhaya case going on, the comments and remarks made by Mukesh Singh has gone viral.  Yes people let’s make him popular and famous by giving him so much attention. Have you guys done anything so far?  Are you just not making money out of what happened to her? I am very against what happened to her and what continues to happen as I type this.  I am guilty as well, because I feel I can’t do anything to stop this.  Of course there are days when I feel like I want to castrate them, feed them to the dogs, behead them, (strangely as I type this church bells are going off – maybe God agrees?) maybe just torture them emotionally.  I agree all these thoughts have gone through my mind in rage. 

But I feel who am I to decide what to do with him?  Was I the person who went through this?  The act of telling the victim over and over again that it is not your fault, don’t you think somewhere in their mind they might be thinking – wait was it my fault? Think about it people, every time you get hurt and you are crying don’t you cry more when someone tells you don’t cry?  This person has gone through something that you will never understand, which you all know is true.  These emotions are the same as when you feel in love, or when someone dies in your family, when your heart breaks.  Something only you can feel, there are certainly no words that will ever ease the pain.  You always get over it in your own time, as they say time heals all.  So who do you think you are to tell the victim how to feel?  Who do you think you are to decide what punishment the convict should get?  I believe let the person who went through it speak and decide what to do with that person.  It is not your revenge to take, it is theirs.  What difference is it; she was abused physically without her consent.  This left an emotional scar, but aren’t you doing the same?  Abusing her right of justice by making this your personal agenda? 

To all you out there NO, you will never know what rape is if you haven’t been through it.  Justice is important with everything, but when your heart breaks only you get past it.  In your own time, imagine how much it hurts if you had to live through this over and over again.  Don’t make it a documentary where the parents live through this time and again.  Let them heal; let the victim decide what they want and need to get over this.  There is hardly ever that I see the victim talking, stop talking for them, stop telling them how to feel, stop making this your own revenge, this is theirs let them have it.  Let them move on, I know they have been through something I will never understand, but we all understand that we all heal and move on in our own time.

Nothing has changed India, unless mothers stop treating their sons like they are god and superior nothing ever will.  So instead of standing out and doing a parade on things, go home and make sure you are raising a good human being.  Plant the right seed so that the tree is shade giving, not one that is prickly.  What I can do to change this is to make sure the men in my family see the women in a respectful way.  What I can do is to make sure the women in my family can defend themselves.  So do that, educate your kids, everything starts at home first.  I know I would wish to kill the person who would have done this to my sister or someone I know, it will bring peace to me.  But what will bring peace to her? 

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